Here’s a scenario from the state government of Victoria who were today supposed to open the Metro Rail Tunnel!

The minions of Allan stand outside one of their newly built rail tunnel stations wearing their shiny new hard hats and their high vis vests…They’re all beaming and every woke bureaucrat available is there along with every b list celebrity in town for the day!

Roll roll up roll up!

Good morning ladies and gentlemen boys and girls! What a great day it is to be a Victorian! Welcome to the opening of the brand new long awaited Metro Rail Tunnel! Today we are taking the first ever ride on the newly completed rail system that is connecting Melbourne and making it easier for people to get around this great city…sorry what? It’s not ready? Oh that’s ok, we can just take a ride anyway given we offered bonuses of $148 million to get it finished by today…what’s that? It’s actually not ready at all? So did we pay the bonuses? We’re not sure? Well ummm ok…this failure to deliver is a direct result of the Morrison government cutting back on infrastructure spending during the pandemic and try as we have to get this job done on time Jeroen Weimar is now going to be brought in to get the project back on track!

Yes folks after more than ten years of digging, lying, over spends, union corruption, hard hats, high vis vests, excuse after excuse, promises after promises the Metro Tunnel is over budget, not delivered and now not open for another year.

We here on the planet of common sense knew it wouldn’t be open today but we are being told it will be worth the wait by all of those with the snouts in the labor trough, which is really anyone on council, in government or with a government contract…plus all those media people who like to have contacts in spring street! In fact it’s most the state, except me of course! But jokes aside this is indeed beyond a joke!

Billions of dollars wasted at a time when? There’s no cash here! No cash! I mean imagine if the state government had saved $1 billion…that’s the entire City of Melbourne budget for a year! Nick Reece could’ve flown to Sydney 1,000 times to hang out with the cool kids! He could’ve paved the streets with trendy graffiti and had the Town Hall painted the colours of what ever woke flag he wanted! Or he could’ve helped with homelessness, offered solutions to crime rates in the CBD, offered drug rehabilitation programs for people in the CBD, designed programs to get people back to the city during the week, offered rent incentives to new businesses…a billion dollars.

Instead Nick doesn’t get his town hall painted, we don’t have programs to reduce drug crime in the CBD and we still don’t have a rail line.

A note to the state Libs…today, instead of wheeling out the same tired old rhetoric go find a few homeless people and ask them what they’d rather…a station that isn’t open or somewhere to sleep for the night? It might teach you something.

Roll up! Roll up for the great train journey that never was!